Friday, September 30, 2016

~facepalm~

Or he's a smartass.
Sounds like something I'd say.


I have 31 days to make a game plan

My initials are L.A. Holy. Fucking. Shit. 
My worst nightmares predicted in one stupid meme. 
If you need me, I'll be in my bunker.


Just trying to simplify things


Thursday, September 29, 2016

I don't know

Woke up, opened my blog, no blogroll. Gone, POOF! Never to return.

I didn't do it. I don't know if anyone intentionally did it, or if the universe just really wanted to fuck with me today. And by extension, fuck with some of y'all.

Now the pisser of it all is this:

To put my blogroll back, I have to open the widget, then open the blog, copy the URL, put it in the widget, click save, go to next blog and repeat. And repeat. And repeat.

I had over 40 blogs on my blogroll. I don't remember what I had on there. I can think of maybe 5 or 10. The rest elude me. So I will do the ones I remember. If there are any I missed that you can't live without, comment here or email me. I'll get to it when I can.

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Kilted to Kick Cancer: Down to the wire

Three more days to donate.
Five holsters to win.
Two knives with custom sheaths to win.
$10 donation gets you entered and helps spread the word.

Oh yeah, and then there's this:

http://www.wbir.com/news/local/five-at-four/kilted-to-kick-cancer/327506734


Thursday, September 22, 2016

Don't call me princess


Finally, a pumpkin spice product I can get behind


Day 22 Kilted to Kick Cancer: Ted Nugent

I have been woefully lax in my posting and prodding (~snerkle~ see what I did there?) about KTKC and y'alls prostates. There is a little over a week left to donate; and if you don't remember the drill, here it is:


  1. Go to Kilted to Kick Cancer HERE.
  2. Make donation in multiples of $10.
  3. Designate your donation to Team Dragon on the checkout page.
  4. When you receive your receipt, email it to Dennis at kilted@dlwtn.com.
  5. Indicate which holster you want to enter to win (Dean Cain, Larry Correia, Jesse James, and now TWO Ted Nugent signed holsters. Or you can break a $10 down into 2 entries for the custom made knives and sheaths. Just let Dennis know where you want your chances.
  6. BONUS: Email your receipt to kelly@kiltedtokickcancer.org for a chance/$10 donation to win an AR-15.
Oh  yeah, and here are the Nugent holsters:



Uncle Ted and Dennis approve this message.

Butt probably not this one.


I didn't need to take the whole test


People wonder why I don't trust clowns


Black Votes Matter


Tuesday, September 20, 2016

So what's an opportunist?


When she finally calls you out of the Friend Zone

But you stopped carrying condoms years ago...


Vikings are why I have trust issues


Daddy, where do Democrats come from?


Just a Texas breeze


Angel: the early years


A gas shortage means an everything shortage

George Patton has an excellent post up in light of the recent gas shortage in the Southeast. He points out that you have to think BEYOND the lack of gas and be prepared:
"Fuel shortages are often about a lot more than you running out of fuel or adjusting your lifestyle because you can’t drive around.  In this case, it was problems with gas.  The next time, it could be diesel.  Most of the 18 wheelers you see running up and down the highway run on diesel.  Those same 18 wheelers deliver groceries daily to your grocery store and fuel to your gas stations.
The impact of this pipeline break is expected to be over in a week, when everything is expected to be back to normal.  Of course they waited a week before they announced it, so that means that the impact was two weeks.
What does that mean to us?  You need to be able to make it for two weeks when nothing else is going wrong.  Two weeks of going to work every day, feeding your family, going to church on Sunday and essentially doing all of the things that you normally do.
So, how do we do that?"

Go read the rest HERE.

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Go participate

Crazy Uncle Bubba has a little question thingy going on over at his place. Who are your favorite musicians living or dead (hint Justin Beiber is not one)? Mine are Stevie Ray Vaughn, Joe Walsh, and Duane Allman. Go tell him who yours are. Remember, there are no wrong answers. Except for Beiber.




Especially the last one


Mae was ahead of her time


Don't worry, I know what I'm doing


Kinda like my first teaching job.
Getting married.
Having kids.
Starting this blog.
Doing my eyebrows.
Which is really what started this. I mean, look at his eyebrows. I've recently been instructed in the art of "dressing the brows". What I have are very thin, fine, strawberry blonde fuzzy worms above my eyes. Putting an "auburn" eyebrow color on them is a very startling change. I've been assured it looks natural, attractive even, like my face is completed (I didn't know it was incomplete). But to me, well, it looks as natural as that dog's eyebrows.

Congrats to vaquero viejo!

Who apparently still has it. That there is a 2016 Champion Header team roping buckle from the BDCC (Broke Dick Cattle Company, a bunch of good ole boys who get together, play with their horses and harass cows for fun). From what he says, it's a round robin tournament, so everyone ropes with everyone, and I guess the best composite times win. Anyway, kudos Cowboy!


Teacher for the win


Thursday, September 15, 2016

Sexy as hell


You can't really see the dude, but you know he's sex on a stick.

Well, my morning is blown


This isn't a .gif.
The dots aren't moving,
your eyes just can't see all 12 at the same time.
They can't even see two adjacent at the same time.