Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Autism Parenting Magazine

For my readers with a loved one or friend with a loved one on the Autism Spectrum, there is something available that I would have sold my mom's kidneys (both of them) for: a magazine devoted to raising kids on the Spectrum. When you're an Autism parent, you not only don't have the instruction manual to the standard model kid, you don't have the manual to the specialized version. You feel lost, isolated, scared, frustrated, and a whole host of other emotions; and you have really no resources other than the exhausted and equally questioning school staff, medical personnel who rely heavily on prescription drugs to manage any symptoms you bring up, and if you're really lucky, a support group of other special needs parents. But it's usually a really small pool of support.

This magazine, as silly as it sounds, kind of normalizes (for lack of a better word) the Autism parenting experience. It broadens the pool of knowledge and support, gives a quick reference to a world of research, resources, therapies, and common experiences. It is something that would have made a huge difference in my life when I was up with the Cute Chicks at 3 am, given me something to read while they were dismantling the VCR and breaking eggs on the kitchen floor.

So I hope this will help some of you find a little comfort in the middle of the night.

Autism Parenting Magazine

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

WiscoDave gets a new dog

Meet the Japanese tanuki.
Raccoon dog. 
Native to East Asia, they're members of the canine family even though
they strongly resemble raccoons.
Companionship and family are very important to tanuki.
They're generally monogamous and live in small close-knit groups.
Male tanuki are very nurturing to their young and have a reputation
for being compassionate partners and doting fathers.
Tanuki are the only canines to hibernate during the winter.
Again going with community and family, they are communal hibernators,
hunkering down in groups.
Tanuki feature prominently in Japanese folklore as Bake-danuki,
or Monster Raccoon Dog, a shape-shifting monster.
In the past couple hundred years, the tanuki have evolved into
more jovial spirits bestowing good fortune and prosperity.
Generally depicted with a bulbous belly, massive scrotum,
and host of goofy facial expressions, he is often seen carrying
a sake flask and a promissory note of unpaid bills.
(Sounds like some of my relatives.)

And believe it or not, the ginormous scrotum has nothing to do with
virility or sexual prowess, even though Japan is kinda kinky like that.
The story dates back to 19th century metal workers who wrapped gold
in tanuki skin before hammering it into gold leaf.
The tanuki skin was so strong that a tiny bit of gold could be
hammered thin enough to stretch across "eight tatami mats".
Because the Japanese terms for small ball of gold (kin no tama) and 
testicles (kintama) sound so similar, the image of the satumi
with large testicular area came to represent good fortune 
and "stretching one's money". And because bake-danuki 
represent prosperity and economic growth,small statues are frequently 
found at the entrance of Japanese bars and restaurants, 
bidding customers to "come in and don't be stingy."

Malaysian Airlines has renovated their home Terminal

PC killed humor

Friday, November 25, 2016

It usually only takes me one

The second and third are for maintenance.

~h/t wirecutter

Max's favorite store

Max is something of a celebrity at the Amarillo Petsmart. We walk in, and it's "Hey Max!" "How's it going, Max?" "Want a cookie, Max?" "Who's a good boy, Max? You are, yes you are, good boy, handsome boy, want to come home with me?"

We drop between $50-100 every trip in there, and those folks don't have a clue what our names are.

Now that men can use the women's restroom, mind your manners

Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Angel's Thanksgiving Day Challenge

Many of you are going to large family gatherings in the next few days. And with larger families, there are diverse, and often hostile, opinions. Especially after this election.

So I'd like you to take a little time and think of how you can ruin Thanksgiving in just four words. Be creative. Be crude. Be yourselves. But mostly, get it out of your system here before you go unleash on your loved ones.

Every species has its Angel

Wheeeeeee!!!!!!! Amen.

Freudian School for Exceptional Kindergarteners

When you give kids Play-doh and ask them to make cannons.....

Shots were fired....

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Toys for Tots - Guard Duty

This has been one of my all-time favorites, first airing in 1997, the year Baby Queen was born. Teen Queen was two and just starting to get into Christmas. When this came on TV, TQ would be stuck to the screen; she'd reach out and try to hold the Marine's hand. She immediately connected the commercial with the Toys for Tots campaign at the local stores, and always looked for the Marines. Fortunately, we'd usually find a couple at the start of the campaign; after that, it was usually run by auxiliary members. But every year she picks out a toy and takes it to the collection bin and gets a sucker. And sometimes a handshake. Which she grins about for days. You Marines are a handsome lot. This is her Christmas tradition. Every year. And I never get through it without a lump in my throat and dust in my eyes.

Semper Fi, all you Marines. You are hard men doing hard things to protect those who can't protect themselves and we thank you.

I'd pick Uncle Jim every time

I know it's been over a week, but....

There's a lid for every pot

My Grandma Evelyn would have loved this. She was a serious student of humanity; even though she was functionally illiterate with a third grade education, she was a keen judge of human character and loved to study art and nature. Whenever she'd see an unlikely coupling, her go-to comment, brief and pithy, was "See? There's a lid for every pot." I still find myself saying this when I see two misfits find each other.

A beautiful tribute

It's difficult to read, but research claims around 650 officers and enlisted
men of the Auxiliary Remount Depot No. 326 in Camp Cody, NM. 1915


A cycle as old as time

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

The Six Million Dollar Wanker

"We'll rebuild him stronger, faster, more powerful...."
"Did you give him a bionic cock?"

I want to hear that 911 call.
"911, what's your emergency?"
"I'm, uh, ahhhh, ahhgggghhhhhhh!!!!!!"
"Sir? SIR?!"

Hey Angel, what did you get for your birthday?

Well, yesterday I got a lovely bottle of Jameson from a friend and I bought myself a Ruger LC380 because Snowflakes give me the sads and I needed a new safe place. I was planning on taking Rolf the Ruger to the range tomorrow for a little getting to know you time, but LIFE gave me a birthday gift while I was sleeping.

Woke up at three with a fever, every joint from my hips down felt like they were under siege, and an elephant was sitting on my chest. My eyes felt like burning sandpaper and I don't know what shit in my mouth before dying, but yeah....I have flu. More like FLU. I managed to get the chicks dressed and off to school, and then I posted something that made a couple of readers do spit takes. Yay me!
Down for a few hours. Up to do mischief, down for a couple hours; up to get Cute Chicks, down again and I can't get up.

So this post is brought to you by Hot Toddies and Nyquil Cold and Flu. Enjoy.

Elections have consequences: Biden's Revenge

Elections have consequences, Part Deux

Elections have consequences