My early years on a dairy farm are the reason I hate huge boobs. That photo could easily have been taken in our barn. Dad claimed milkers were harmful to the cows, and threw a fit when my little brother purchased one.
The night was dark The moon was high We were all alone just her and I her hair was brown Her eyes were blue I knew just what she wanted to do Her eyes so sad her body so fine I ran my fingers down her spine With all my might I did my best To place my hand upon her breast Tis in the past Its long gone now The very first time I milked a cow.
Yes, Farmer John I still have the knack, both cows and goats. My grandma made the best goat's milk cheese, I spent summer's from 8-18 with her learning to bake bread, can, milk animals, and fry chicken. Amongst other womanly pursuits.
When I was about six, I was staying with my paternal grandparents for the summer. They ran a dairy/general all around farm. Grandpa always milked the family milk cow into a tin cup for me in the barn, before he finished filling a gallon pail.
One fine day, he had to do something else--a doctor's appointment, I think--and had my uncle take over chores in the evening. Told him, in my hearing, to milk the gurnsey into the cup for me. So, I took my cup to my uncle, expecting to get my milk, and he told me that he wasn't going to do it.
I was not happy about that. I was then as independent minded and stubborn as I am now...and that was the only milk I was willing to drink (only milk I liked). Still warm, straight from the cow. So, I got my own.
No, I didn't use the cup.
Yes, I washed the teat off, first.
My uncle had a conniption.
But I did have my fill of milk. Got my face washed by the cow for my efforts.
Yup. Goats and cows. I even have had the dubious honor of milking a cow in a nice dress, heels, and all fancied up for a date. That was an interesting experience. ;) For some reason it's always shocked people that I milked cows.
I've also vaccinated, branded, castrated, tagged and all the other fun stuff. Once we had twins that needed to be supplemented with bottles. I has a newborn, so he was strapped on and I had two bottles. It was fun! Even pulled calves while I was 5+ months pregnant. That earns you a tongue lashing from just about everyone you can think of; the vet, the OB, your hubby, extended family...yeah, I got an ear full.
Wow, that turned into more than you thought you'd hear.
I feed and clean up after Holsteins on weekends. The best cow is wrapped in green paper in my opinion, but it does afford me the opportunity to play with BIG GREEN TOYS! So, I guess it is a wash.....
You are a never-ending source of fascinating sexual innuendos.
ReplyDeleteI have inspected, injected, medicated and castrated livestock. I have yet to milk.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was young, I worked on dairy farms. Long hard days.
ReplyDeleteMilked more than one cow and been kicked to prove it.
ReplyDeleteEver milk a goat? It's about the same as milking a cow except you have to back it up to a wall first to keep Abdul away until you're done.
I have :)
ReplyDeleteDo you still have the knack?
ReplyDeleteFarmer John
I dated a lactating fat chick once.
ReplyDeleteMy early years on a dairy farm are the reason I hate huge boobs.
ReplyDeleteThat photo could easily have been taken in our barn. Dad claimed milkers were harmful to the cows, and threw a fit when my little brother purchased one.
The night was dark
ReplyDeleteThe moon was high
We were all alone
just her and I
her hair was brown
Her eyes were blue
I knew just what
she wanted to do
Her eyes so sad
her body so fine
I ran my fingers
down her spine
With all my might
I did my best
To place my hand
upon her breast
Tis in the past
Its long gone now
The very first time
I milked a cow.
Cows and goats. But to put any rumors to rest I have NEVER milked a bull. What about you?
ReplyDeleteGrand, why, whatevah do you mean, sir?
ReplyDeleteYes, Farmer John I still have the knack, both cows and goats. My grandma made the best goat's milk cheese, I spent summer's from 8-18 with her learning to bake bread, can, milk animals, and fry chicken. Amongst other womanly pursuits.
Millwright, only two-legged bulls.
Hated Dad's chicken farm up north... dirty work...
ReplyDeleteThanks God, Never had to worry about milking them things...
I can hear my jr high Vo Ag teacher now.
ReplyDelete"They arent tits, they arent tit ties.... they are TEATS!"
Farmer John
Yeah, teats. ~giggle~ Damn it's too late for this shit. ;-D
ReplyDeleteWhen I was about six, I was staying with my paternal grandparents for the summer. They ran a dairy/general all around farm. Grandpa always milked the family milk cow into a tin cup for me in the barn, before he finished filling a gallon pail.
ReplyDeleteOne fine day, he had to do something else--a doctor's appointment, I think--and had my uncle take over chores in the evening. Told him, in my hearing, to milk the gurnsey into the cup for me. So, I took my cup to my uncle, expecting to get my milk, and he told me that he wasn't going to do it.
I was not happy about that. I was then as independent minded and stubborn as I am now...and that was the only milk I was willing to drink (only milk I liked). Still warm, straight from the cow. So, I got my own.
No, I didn't use the cup.
Yes, I washed the teat off, first.
My uncle had a conniption.
But I did have my fill of milk. Got my face washed by the cow for my efforts.
Yup. Goats and cows. I even have had the dubious honor of milking a cow in a nice dress, heels, and all fancied up for a date. That was an interesting experience. ;) For some reason it's always shocked people that I milked cows.
ReplyDeleteI've also vaccinated, branded, castrated, tagged and all the other fun stuff. Once we had twins that needed to be supplemented with bottles. I has a newborn, so he was strapped on and I had two bottles. It was fun! Even pulled calves while I was 5+ months pregnant. That earns you a tongue lashing from just about everyone you can think of; the vet, the OB, your hubby, extended family...yeah, I got an ear full.
Wow, that turned into more than you thought you'd hear.
-Concerned Mama
Yep, From the time I was too young to remember. ---My granny used to shoot milk in the barn cats mouth. Ray
ReplyDeleteI think anyone that's milked a cow has done what that guy was doing...
ReplyDeleteI feed and clean up after Holsteins on weekends. The best cow is wrapped in green paper in my opinion, but it does afford me the opportunity to play with BIG GREEN TOYS! So, I guess it is a wash.....
ReplyDeleteLeigh
yeah Lineman, done that a time or two.
ReplyDeleteWell, actually it wasnt milk, and it wasn't a cat........
nevermind.
Farmer John