Way back in the 1970s, I belonged to a bicycle touring/racing club. We held an annual 100-mile tour in the middle of the summer, followed by an evening banquet. At the banquet, we gave out various awards, like for the oldest/youngest male/female, who traveled the farthest to attend our tour, etc.
The most coveted award, though, was the "busted crank" award. It was a broken bicycle crank arm mounted to a warped piece of wood that had a bad varnish job. The award was given to the rider who could tell the saddest story of their day's ride. One guy won it one year when he told about how he decided to take a nap under a shade tree in the middle of the ride, then fell asleep until it got dark. He was fortunate the "sag wagons" were still out looking for him, so he hitched a ride to the banquet with the sag.
But the best "saddest" story was from a woman one year. She said that she broke a couple of spokes on her back wheel early in the tour, which put her wheel out-of-round. She said, "Do you know how hard it is to ride 100 miles on a vibrator!?" Needless to say, most of the listeners didn't think that was a sad tale, but we gave her the award anyway! Immediately after she said "vibrator" she realized what she had said, but she joined in the laughter.
See angel statue two posts down...
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome
ReplyDeleteyou gettin a bike now or what
ReplyDeleteCuttlebone? Eh, I'm hard of herring tonight.
ReplyDelete"beats hell outta a washing machine."
ReplyDeleteWay back in the 1970s, I belonged to a bicycle touring/racing club. We held an annual 100-mile tour in the middle of the summer, followed by an evening banquet. At the banquet, we gave out various awards, like for the oldest/youngest male/female, who traveled the farthest to attend our tour, etc.
ReplyDeleteThe most coveted award, though, was the "busted crank" award. It was a broken bicycle crank arm mounted to a warped piece of wood that had a bad varnish job. The award was given to the rider who could tell the saddest story of their day's ride. One guy won it one year when he told about how he decided to take a nap under a shade tree in the middle of the ride, then fell asleep until it got dark. He was fortunate the "sag wagons" were still out looking for him, so he hitched a ride to the banquet with the sag.
But the best "saddest" story was from a woman one year. She said that she broke a couple of spokes on her back wheel early in the tour, which put her wheel out-of-round. She said, "Do you know how hard it is to ride 100 miles on a vibrator!?" Needless to say, most of the listeners didn't think that was a sad tale, but we gave her the award anyway! Immediately after she said "vibrator" she realized what she had said, but she joined in the laughter.
Rusty
ROFL
ReplyDelete