Dear God, I do love all these fargin' bastiches, no matter how irritating and maddening they are. Please keep me from killing every last one of them and making coin purses out of their tanned scrotums. I beseech you, Dear Lord, to give me peace and love for these fuckers. I will do my best. Amen
I have found the cure to be grilled cheese sandwiches. But with a twist. Smear cream cheese on one slice, smear nutella on the other slice, and cut up a banana for the middle. Slap em together and butter the outsides and toss in a hot pan just like you would a regular grilled cheese. Nicely browned. Friggen amazing, I can go through an entire loaf of bread with one good case of PMS.
Well Angle, at least you are gracious enough to admit to your PMS. Heck in our house no such words are allowed... And if accidentally mentioned, dishes get broken as she points out that just because she wants to kill everyone and hates everyone and wish we were better more obedient people (ahem) it doesn't mean she is PMSing... Of course we all agree as we cower under the bed...
ReplyDelete16 things PMS stand for...
1,Pass My Shotgun
2,Psychotic Mood Shift
3,Perpetual Munching Spree
4,Puffy Mid Section
5,Provide Me with Sweets
6,Pardon My Sobbing
7,Pass My Suitcase
8,Purchase More Shoes
9,People May Suffer
10,Pimples May Surface
11,Pass My Sweat pants
12,Pissy Mood Syndrome
13, Plainly - Men Suck
14, People Make me Sick
15, Putting up with Men's $hit
and my favourite...
16, Potential Murder Suspect! :)
Cranky, I believe you know your way to the naughty corner.
ReplyDeleteWhy do women call it PMS?
ReplyDeleteBecause mad cow disease was already taken.
CRANKY!!! TO THE CORNER! FUCKING NOW!!!!
ReplyDeleteWhy do men fart more than women? Because women won't shut up long
ReplyDeleteenough to build up pressure.
Am I really that much of a sweetheart that y'all don't even fear me when I'm pms-ing?
ReplyDeleteNo one including you will ever find me in my bunker.
ReplyDeleteYou stay in there long enough, I'll flush you out with milfs and beer.
ReplyDeleteWhat's the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull?
ReplyDeleteLipstick.
Cranky, start your own fucking blog. BANNED
ReplyDeleteWhat is the difference between a terrorist and a PMS woman?
ReplyDeleteYou can negotiate with the terrorist.
LMAO
ReplyDeleteI'm laughing so hard I can't remember any other jokes.
ReplyDeleteDid you hear about the woman who never experienced PMS?
Neither have I.
Seriously, rpm? Your first fucking comment of the night? Go sit with Cranky. ;-) I'll be over later to deal with y'all.
ReplyDeleteWe'll compare notes, thanks for the idea!
ReplyDeletedammit, dammit, dammit
ReplyDeletePMS? How can you tell?
ReplyDeleteFarmer John
Dear God,
ReplyDeleteI do love all these fargin' bastiches, no matter how irritating and maddening they are. Please keep me from killing every last one of them and making coin purses out of their tanned scrotums. I beseech you, Dear Lord, to give me peace and love for these fuckers. I will do my best.
Amen
Hey, a roommate of mine had 2-week periods and 2 weeks of PMS. I have seen Hell up close and personal.
ReplyDeleteAt least Angel only gets like this for a couple of days...as opposed to Proglodytes, who are psychotic, hate-filled and irrational every single day.
Thank you Wraith, you can come sit by me, darlin'.
ReplyDeleteWe love you, too.
ReplyDeleteBy the way,
Were those sparks flying from your fingertips a few minutes ago?
Why? Did you hear echoed voices in the night? Good night rpm, sweet dreams.
ReplyDeleteI have found the cure to be grilled cheese sandwiches. But with a twist. Smear cream cheese on one slice, smear nutella on the other slice, and cut up a banana for the middle. Slap em together and butter the outsides and toss in a hot pan just like you would a regular grilled cheese. Nicely browned.
ReplyDeleteFriggen amazing, I can go through an entire loaf of bread with one good case of PMS.
Well Angle, at least you are gracious enough to admit to your PMS. Heck in our house no such words are allowed... And if accidentally mentioned, dishes get broken as she points out that just because she wants to kill everyone and hates everyone and wish we were better more obedient people (ahem) it doesn't mean she is PMSing...
ReplyDeleteOf course we all agree as we cower under the bed...