Thursday, April 17, 2014

Using your head (the big one)

A couple, both age 78, went to a sex therapist's office. The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?"
The man said, "Will you watch us have sex?"
The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.
When the couple finished, the doctor said, "There's nothing wrong with the way you have sex," and charged them $50.
This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have sex with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.
Finally, the doctor asked, "Just exactly what are you trying to find out?"
"We're not trying to find out anything," the husband replied.
"She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50...and I get $43 back from Medicare."

What? Too soon?


California street art

How to explode liberal heads

I actually had this argument once with a leather Birkenstock-wearing PETAphile. Here's how it is, sister.
The eggs we eat are unfertilized ova, full of protein and possibilities but nary a baby chicken in sight.
The fetuses that are aborted are fertilized ova, aka actual real live human babies, full of human possibilities.

Breakfast eggs, unfertilized, no babies.
Aborted fetuses, fertilized, babies.

Now go get a couple of Egg McMuffins and shut the fuck up.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Call Al Gore! This must be stopped!

Buh-bye, bitch

And, dear God, all the fucking squash!

The world couldn't spin without BO

This world has been here far longer than environmentalists, liberals, and Barack Obama. Species fade out, new species are discovered, the weather patterns shift, the climate corrects itself. With or without the interference of man. It takes someone supremely egotistical with a God complex to think he can change nature with a pen and a phone.