Monday, April 18, 2016

Warning: Transmicroaggression trigger ahead


LGBTQ activists have called upon Mr. Schwarzenegger to denounce the movie as being anti-trannie. There has been no comment from the former governor or his agent. In related news, the actor, Miko Hughes, was dragged out of his residence by a mob of Cher impersonators and publicly flogged with 10-inch dildos. He was last seen sobbing, "I didn't know! I was just a boy! Have pity on me, I was just a boy!" At that declaration of sexual identity, he was further flogged.

The LGBTQ has demanded that the movie and all it's copies be changed to say, "A child may or may not have a penis and or vagina, and that has nothing to do with said child's gender identity." If this is not accomplished by May, all copies of the movie will be gathered and burned on the steps of the Capitol.

This just in, LGBTQ leaders have joined forces with NOW to demand the immediate removal of the Washington Monument*. Said Terry O'Neill, president of NOW, "Just look at it! A big white marble phallus jutting aggressively from the soft fertile flesh of Mother Gaia! It's a travesty!" To which the reporter responded, "Isn't that what transsexualism is all about?" The reporter has been missing since Tuesday.

*I missed you guys.

6 comments:

Irish said...

Glad to see you're back up and running :)

Unclezip said...

Good to see you back. Sounds like you got your tranny tuned.

Stretch said...

Washington "Monument" not memorial.
Ya, pedantic but I'm a native Washingtonian.

Phillip said...

I'm trying to figure out how much of that was sarcasm and parody, or if it was based on something that is really happening. The news has crossed the event horizon where stories from The Onion look as plausible as the stories from CNN-MSNBC-FoxNews...

rick c said...

Glad to see you back up. Oh yeah,go Linux. It's better and it's free.Screw the spawn of gates.

Keith Pearson said...

Welcome back, and I'm glad all is well, not anything serious. Except of course, the stroke inducing Win10. I read about the privacy problems with it, and was already skeptical. Then I wake up one morning to a warning that it's about to update. I neither requested nor acted to make this happen. Warning bells all over the place. Remember, if you aren't paying for the product, you *are* the product. People quickly found a way to kill it.