Appropriate for a dickhead

When your kids don't knock

Your mid-week inappropriate humor post

Wirecutter: The Retirement Years

Marge? What were you going for here?

Well, that's disappointing

I want, no, NEED these!

Because, you know, "slow" shouldn't be slow

Rules of Engagement

I need y'all's sage advice. Say, hypothetically, you've had a shitty weekend and a shittier Monday. And say, hypothetically, you came home from school pickup with a cranky teen and found that someone had left something on your doorstep, like this:

No note, nothing identifying the person who left it or why. Just a bottle of Jack Daniel's on your doorstep. My questions are:

1. How long do I have to wait to crack it open? 7-10 days to make sure the rightful owner doesn't claim it?

2. Do I have immediate rights of ownership since it was on my doorstep?

3. If the person who left it reads this, please get in touch with me for a thank you. And possibly a drink.

Trick or Treat: College student level

How many of you have taken someone's "gun virginity"?

One of the things I enjoy most is taking a non-shooter to the range and introducing them to the joys of shooting. That first-time shooter grin, the gleam in the eyes, you can actually FEEL the other person's adrenaline rush. But that's not enough, that's like giving a baby a taste of chocolate and then leaving them in the candy aisle alone. You need to follow through. Make sure they get the training they need (if indeed they are as addicted as you think they are). Make sure you keep at 'em to get to a point of safety and comfort with their weapon of choice. You may not always be RIGHT THERE to walk them through it; but if you are, lucky you! There is such joy in birthing a new shooter and raising them up right. But if you can't be hands on, keep the lines of communication, support and encouragement open.

Tell me your stories.

Fair warning

The reason MILFY Monday is so important

And fresh baked cookies!

I remember this

This was how both of my grandmas planted their gardens. I asked why, once. Once was all it took to get the answer. "Because that's how it's done."

Name the cartoon

When the duct tape gives out

For Poppy

Whose two favorite phrases are "Just one more cast" and "I've got a really good feeling about this next spot". He taught me how to bait my own hook, unhook my own fish, and ~gack~ clean them.

Billy has priorities

I always "talked" to Charlie

And she always gave me that adoring/indulgent look that smart people give to not-so-smart people. Now I know why.

My secret shame

This really needs to be a brothel

Just confirming my reservation

You know, on the Express Party Bus to Hell.

How long are we going to wait this time?

Talk about a babe magnet

Thinning the herd

KTKC Update from Dennis

"This is FANTASTIC!

Just a short 24 hours ago, we crossed the $2,500 barrier, and added a third holster to the giveaway. The next holster gets added to the give-away if we cross a total of $3,750 in donations.

As of 1PM today (Friday) we're at $3,423....a mere $327 away from adding yet ANOTHER crocodile-skin holster to the drawing, for a total of FOUR being given away.

Four of our Signature Valkyrie holsters, replete in Crocodile skin for the full-size 1911.

To all those who have donated and made our rookie outing one for the record books, THANK YOU!

If you haven't yet donated, PLEASE consider doing so, for a very good cause!

One out of Seven men will be diagnosed with Prostate Cancer. One out of 38 will die from it. That means if you took 100 guys and tossed them in a room, fully 15 of them could have Prostate Cancer.

Out of those 15, three will die from it.

Those odds simply won't do.

Donate here: http://www.kiltedtokickcancer.org/product/ktkc-donation-2015/

If you wish to be entered in the holster drawing, simply forward your PayPal receipt to dragon@dlwtn.com, and for every $5 you donated, you'll get one entry in the hat. Donate $10, your name is in twice. Donate $20, its in four times.

If you don't want a holster, thats OK to, its not a requirement. smile emoticon

And lastly...a repeat picture, because I really HATE the one I took last night in the hopes of posting it today...."

Now, imagine if you dare,

Wirecutter, bare chested, white legs gleaming like ivory,

a soft California breeze lifting the hem of his miniskirt....

He promised.

Free fluffnuggets in Wisconsin

B over at MiddleoftheRight has four free fluffnuggets who need homes. He's in the NWI area (I'm guessing that's Northern Wisconsin for us flatlanders) and he guarantees their efficacy as mice catchers. He's also offered to ship a free possum to wirecutter if he finds good homes for all these little fluffies. Contact info is at the link. 

Someone out there

probably tried it.

Once.

At wirecutter and Miss Lisa's retirement cabin

Repurposing done right

And still towable. 

I really think I need one of these.

Boehner is resigning the end of October

A spokesperson for Boehner’s office told the Daily Advocate:

“Speaker Boehner believes that the first job of any Speaker is to protect this institution and, as we saw yesterday with the Holy Father, it is the one thing that unites and inspires us all.”

“The Speaker’s plan was to serve only through the end of last year. Leader Cantor’s loss in his primary changed that calculation.”

“The Speaker believes putting members through prolonged leadership turmoil would do irreparable damage to the institution.”

“He is proud of what this majority has accomplished, and his Speakership, but for the good of the RepublicanConference and the institution, he will resign the Speakership and his seat in Congress, effective October 30.”

http://dailyadvocate.com/news/5183/boehner-announces-resignation

Meanwhile at Angel's bunker....

Tip for my hunting readers

It's never too early to summon a demon

And that's why I get my books on Amazon

Why you don't send your wife to the hardware store

Bubba was fixin' a door and found that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife Mary Louise to the hardware store. At the hardware store, Mary Louise saw a beautiful teapot on a top shelf while she was waiting for Joe Bob, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer.

When Joe Bob finished, Mary Louise asked how much for the teapot.

Joe Bob replied, "That's silver and it's $100!"

"My goodness! That sure is a lotta money!" Mary Louise exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge Bubba had sent her to buy, and Joe Bob went to the back room to find it.

From the backroom, Joe Bob yelled, "Mary Louise, you want a screw for that hinge?"

To which Mary Louise replied, "No! But I will for the teapot!"

~from vaquero viejo

Texas Forever

I live somewhere off the coast of the Netherlands.

Kilted to Kick Cancer: My oh my

Okay, you know Dennis of Dragon Leatherworks has been in this fundraising contest for the month of September, and has done really well with your support and generosity. At one point, briefly, he held the top spot. But Team HBC Concealment dumps a large sum and pulls ahead. They're probably out of reach at almost $1200 ahead, but we can scare them a bit with a last minute push.

Now, again, no heroic donations are necessary, just a buck or two from as many as possible would work. And there is incentive. Yes, mighty incentive. Dennis has added another holster to the drawing, and a possible 3rd if he hits $2500. Right now, he's just $192 from that goal. For every $5 donated, you get your name in the drawing. Just email a copy of your Paypal receipt to him at dragon@dlwtn.com. DONATE HERE.

And if that wasn't enough, oh God I can't believe this, it's just soooooo wrong on so many levels....
Wirecutter has added this "Okay, and if that ain't enough, check this shit out. If Dennis wins the fucking contest I will pose in a fucking miniskirt, topless, and post it on my blog for the world to see. (wait, is this incentive to donate or NOT to donate?!) Yup, I will thoroughly humiliate myself for this." Just in case you think I'm lying, HERE.

Dear God in Heaven. Dennis has informed me that there has been a custom donation of $200 specifically citing wirecutter's offer. You crazy fuckers want to see that? I guess offering to go topless if Dennis wins isn't necessary. WC's got it covered.

Compliments of Crazy WiscoDave.

So much for being a trained classical actor

Soft porn for geeks since 1966.

And that's why I can't go back to Golden Dragon

Walmart, always keeping it classy

Well, I'm impressed

For my vertically challenged readers

Done before we pull out of the drive-thru

Wonder if they give bulk discounts

Anal-cranial inversion syndrome

Thigh gaps are overrated

Bet y'all never thought about that one

There should be a coupon for pudding

I had such good intentions

Oh, now that's just rude.