Saturday, June 28, 2014

and when the lawnmower tries to finish me

I got up this morning around 7, fixed a full country breakfast with homemade buttermilk biscuits, sausage gravy, hash browns, BACON, sausage (see gravy) and apple pie preserves (some of us like our biscuits gravyless). Cleaned the kitchen, got lunch started (pulled pork in the slow cooker), and went to the garage to kick the Craftsman's ass. I got it a couple of summers ago, bought it and a Toro riding mower from the same lady for $400. The Toro had a flat tire and needed a tune up, and the Craftsman needed a new battery, blades and something was hinky with the fuel system. God, I love rich divorced women. Got the Toro spit shined and running smooth and sold it a few weeks ago for $700. That left me with almost a half-acre and a 17-year-old Craftsman push mower, so I decided to start working on the Craftsman. From about 10 am, it got a tune up, new fuel pump, new carburetor, two new blades. Started up the first try and had the front, sides and alley done in no time. Damn, I'm good.

And look! All fingers present and accounted for! (Had to get a pic of my greasy hand so y'all wouldn't think I was telling a fib about working.)


20 comments:

Critter said...

Damn! Yer a good woman! Can ya clean fish, too?

hiswiserangel said...

Yes sir, I can clean, fillet and fry up a mess of fish with collards, loaded baked potato salad, hush puppies and peach cobbler. Why?

Corey said...

Good for you.

Phil said...

I'm getting awfully thin, down to one fifty. That breakfast menu is making my mouth water.

I wish my wife could cook like you, already have a new mower and a useless kid to push it.

There is an MG Midget motor sitting on the floor out in the garage finally calling my name, if you ain't busy, stop on by.........

Anonymous said...

Yes sir, I can clean, fillet and fry up a mess of fish with collards, loaded baked potato salad, hush puppies and peach cobbler. Why?


dammit girl
now im hungry

livin to ride

Robert Fowler said...

Peach cobbler??? Hot? With vanilla ice cream???

Keads said...

Well done! I could always use another wrench turner around here (or is that wench turner. I get those confused).

hiswiserangel said...

Corey, thank you ~deep curtsy~.

Phil, I'll bring a dozen biscuits and a jar of apple pie preserves.

livin', one of these days, there will be a Blogger Blowout and I'll feed y'all.

Robert, of course hot with vanilla ice cream, are we animals?????

Keads, a "wench turner" would be you. I hold the wrench, then you pick me up and turn us both. See how that works?

Keads said...

Thanks for clearing that up =)

hiswiserangel said...

We can do a quick demonstration if needed. :-)

Keads said...

Heh!

Critter said...

Have to get a good solid hold on that wench.

Jesse in DC said...

An angel of many talents,all of which will likely prove to be useful. And there is nothing sexier than a woman with grease under the fingernails...

Dave In Indiana said...

Dayam! A woman that can tune up a lawn mower deserves a rock composed of tightly compacted and heated carbon on her wedding band. Whya doin' all that for that cheap skate? ;)

hiswiserangel said...

Jesse, I'm the kind of woman who can wear engine grease and Hoppes #9....and nothing else.

Dave, I do it for ME because I got tired of pushing a damn mower over 1/2 acre.

Volfram said...

If you are reading this, the worst thing that has ever happened to you could not kill you.

Show that lawnmower who's boss.

Doc said...

Nothing is sexier than hoppes#9 scented neked wiser red head angel!

West Tx at Heart said...

you need a bath... go take your clothes off

Miss Lisa said...

having not read any comments...just looking at pic...your arm has been injured...so your place your fingertips upon a burner on the stove...to take a photo...and this of course is after you have fallen in the hallway, stung in the eyeball by a mosquito....my God Leslie...I am seriously starting to wonder if you are self mutilating....

hiswiserangel said...

Miss Lisa, I've been trying to self-destruct for years, I'm either indestructable or completely incompetent.