Rants, Raves and Recipes from the Edge of Sanity
A Reading from the Book of Armaments, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20: Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the count and the number of the count shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."Or, for those who want the full context:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOrgLj9lOwkPhil B
Secretary Mattis... pure magic.https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/James_Mattis"I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you fuck with me, I’ll kill you all." - After the invasion of Iraq - and *after* sending his tanks and artillery home- Mattis sent this message to the Iraqi leaders in every area his men served in
I'm the Patron Saint of Mayhem, Confusion and Unplugged Boats.
The first two generally resulting from the third. I need to post pics of that candle; it's truly epic.
Amen and Amen...so let it be written...so let it be done....vaquero viejo
Let us not forget that thou art the patron saint of Irreverent Logic and Cussidness.Yea verily.
I can't be a saint considering where I'm headed (in a handbasket). But if I must, I'll be the Saint of Shenanigans and Fuckery.
Umm ... patron saint of Red Headed Stepchildren?Yeah, yeah. I know: the corner.
Post a Comment