Sunday, June 4, 2017

A future member of Chi Omega

I was very anti-Greek in college. For one thing, I was poor. Not barely scraping by poor, but $14 for food for a month poor. Definitely NOT sorority material. For another thing, I was a free thinker. More importantly, I was a thinker.

In the late 80s-early 90s, college girl hairdos ran to the permed, big bangs, and fabric bows. The bigger the bow, the more important you were. It was a bowochracy. The two sororities at WTAMU were the Chi Omegas (Chi-O, Chi-O, it's off to bed we go, with whips and chains and kinky things, Chi-O! Chi-o, chi-o, chi-o....) and the Delta Zetas (Sleazy DZies). I was a Gamma Delta Iota (goddamned independent) and for a while a Rho Omega Tau Chi (ROTC). Anyway, where was I going with this? Oh yeah, sorority girls and bowheads. You could tell the popular guys on campus, the tradition was to nail a bowhead and take her bow as a trophy. The guys would hang them on bolo ties from their truck's rearview mirrors. Nothing pisses off a sorority girl like getting in her guy's truck and seeing a sorority sister's bow hanging from his bolo. Or worse, seeing a rival sorority's bow hanging there.

Sorority girls in Texas grow up to be Junior Leaguers. If you don't know what those are, look it up, Skippy. One of the great joys of life is telling Junior Leaguer jokes.

What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a Junior Leaguer?
After sex, the prostitute says, "That's it." They nymphomaniac says, "That's it?!" and the Junior Leaguer says, "That's it! I'll paint the ceiling peach!"

What's the difference between a Junior Leaguer and Jello? Jello moves when you eat it.

Why don't Junior Leaguers like orgies? They hate writing all those thank you notes.

I could go on, but....


9 comments:

Anonymous said...

YOU NEED TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT, CORRECTION FIRST EMPRESS OF THE US OF A

Wildflower

Anonymous said...

I never did the frat trip.... for one thing, like you, Wise Angel One, i was a bit independent...for another,where I went to school, the "frats" were identified as Company C (C Troop Jocks) or Company D (Spider D) or some other regimental moniker....of course, TAMU, now has frats....and a gay student body pres, and a black prof in favor of "killing a number of white people"...ahhh, progress.....


vaquero viejo

Anonymous said...

WTAMU?
Sorry, it will always be West Texas State University in our hearts...
Want nothing to do with the traitorous A&M
(hack, spit)
HOOK 'EM
Mike (WTSU 1985)

oldawg said...

Didn't have many of those sorority girls out on the boulevard. At least not around the Blue Mirror or the Casa Del.....or any of the good places (Panhandle Ballroom,T-13,Triangle,or Lakeside) That I recall. Ah what hoop-whoop times I had in my twenties and thirties. And that doesn't count all the Sundays out in the county getting well.

hiswiserangel said...

I have a BS from WTSU and a MA from WTAMU. And they're two years apart.
There's a "Vintage Buff" sticker on the momvan.

Stretch said...

How can you tell when a Junior Leaguer has an orgasm?
She drops her nail file.

What's a Junior Leaguer's perfect house?
4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, no kitchen.

What's the difference between a Junior Leaguer and Trailer Trash?
With Trailer Trash the diamonds are fake and the orgasms real.

rickn8or said...

"Nothing pisses off a sorority girl like getting in her guy's truck..."

How often does a sorority girl get in a pickup truck, even in Texas?

(Don't bother with the rest, I know how often, rapidly and easily a sorority girl gets pissed off.)

C. S. P. Schofield said...

From my (late) mother's generation;

BWOC before graduation means Big Woman On Campus

after graduation means Bitch When On Committees

Anonymous said...

Thought you might like, missy. Sounds like our type of people, maybe another redhead (if only in spirit)
https://snarkyinthesuburbs.com/2011/03/29/so-i-was-kicked-out-of-the-junior-league-is-that-so-wrong/