Saturday, April 30, 2016

Miss Lisa retaliates

I knew I wasn't going to get away with it. But I tried.

synchronized selfies


I haven't posted much about the meeting with Wirecutter and Miss Lisa, mostly because I'm still recovering. What a whirlwind trip! So much to do, so little time to do it and we still missed quite a bit. WC missed the first class Panhandle-Plains Historical Museum on the campus of WTAMU. I would have bet money the curators would have tried to put him back in one of the Old West displays. I would have loved to have taken them into Palo Duro Canyon for some treasure hunting (there are still bits and drabs of Alibates flint treasures to be found if you're game to go a ways off the beaten path.) A trip to the actual Alibates flint quarries on the Canadian river then a quick jaunt to the site of Adobe Walls would have been on the agenda. The Second Battle of Adobe Walls saw the famous long-distance shot by Billy Dixon. There's not much to see at the ruins, but you can definitely feel the ghosts of the battle. Shopping on Historic 6th Street (Route 66) in Amarillo, and steaks at Youngblood's Cafe. We packed as much as we could into three days, but there never is enough time.

We did manage to knock off a Bucket List item for both Miss Lisa and myself, ziplining across Palo Duro Canyon (just a 1/4 mile wide finger, but still breathtaking). The young lady who checked us in and fitted us with the equipment told us the fluorescent wrist bands were to help find the bodies at the bottom of the Canyon if anything went wrong. Bless her heart. Mom and Miss Lisa and I had lunch and shopping while Poppy, WC and the pups chilled at the old casa. I think they had as good a time dude bonding as we did female bonding. Mom and Poppy just love the Lanes; story of my life, my folks always like my friends better. We finally got down to taking some pics the last morning, before they headed east, but didn't get any pics of them with the folks. Dammit! Y'all are going to have to come back for a week or so!

Miss Lisa asked me to run  the pics by her for approval, something about extra chins. But you know what? My hair looked like I'd escaped from an asylum after shock therapy, I have extra chins, bumps and fat rolls, and WC doesn't have an ass. We're all beautiful disasters. So here's what I had on my camera:

Sorry, Miss Lisa, all I see is Strong Woman!
The hint of a smile.

That's as big a smile as you're gonna get!

CGD looking for a place to pee.
And finding it.

There is so much that still needs to be seen and so many things left to say, but as I told Miss Lisa before she got in the truck, this isn't goodbye, it's see ya later!

"I'm just going to grab a couple of things"

And that's why I needed the .45ACP

Sad, but very true

Friday, April 29, 2016

My brand of feminism

h/t Jesse in DC

Live and learn

A fatal error

No shit

The guilt is overwhelming

All the time I got to spend with Wirecutter and Miss Lisa was wonderful. But that meant I also spent time with CGD and Lucy. And you simply cannot spend time with those two with out snuggles and scratchies and tons of dog hair. I'd come home covered in it.

The first day I brought Max with me, but he stayed with Mom and Poppy while I went running around with the Lanes and Co. The very brief time I brought him out to meet CGD and Lucy was full of growls and male dominant puffery. From Max, not CGD. Lucy was also a bit of a bitch, but that's her prerogative. CGD was curious and sniffing and wanting to say hi. Max was growly and barky and wanting to tear into something. My little terrier-ist. So after that, when I went to visit, Max stayed home. Pissed him off ten ways to Sunday. He hates being left behind, but bad behavior will not be rewarded (we're still in Doggy Training because Max is so strong willed).

So I'd go spend time with wc and Miss Lisa and come home smelling like CGD and Lucy. And Max did not approve. He'd huff and snort, give me the cold shoulder, look at me with big sad brown eyes very disapprovingly, and at night when I put my clothes in the hamper, he'd pull them out and pee on them. Take that, you other dog loving slut! He refused to sleep on the bed, preferring his dog bed on the floor. Wouldn't let me rub his belly, wouldn't let me scratch his ears. He finally softened his heart Wednesday, after I stayed home all day, took him for walkies, and washed my slutty clothes of all the other dog scent. Today he's back to my sweet, loving terrier-ist, sleeping on the couch next to me, softly snoring.


Thursday, April 28, 2016


I renounce any and all ties to Sam and Holly Kerodin and any III% Patriot entities they form or support. I will not comment on or make another post regarding either of them or their supporters. You can't change small minds and you can't save soulless people. Every vile and hateful word spewed from his mouth/laptop does not require a response from me or any other True Patriot. I honestly can not imagine any of the Founding Fathers penning such disgusting filth about the wives of any of their foes. Did that discredit them as Patriots? No, it qualified them as True Men.

I have a feeling that Sam feeds on the controversy and attention. What would kill him is to become forgotten, ignored, irrelevant. Fighting with the Kerodins is like wrestling with a pig, you both get dirty and the pig likes it. I'm climbing out of the morale morass that Sam uses as his playground and getting on with my life. I'd like to invite the rest of you to join me.

Preach it, Carl

And you just read that in Carl Spackler's voice.
And you'll probably start singing "Sexual Healing" in his voice, too.
You're welcome.

Trust me, you'll be singing this all day

Mistress Angel desires mustard

Sunday, April 24, 2016

c. 1930

I would have been the over-dramatic one in the front. 
I may be naughty, but my knees are still together.

Thursday, April 21, 2016

Gotta love the VFW

The only thing stopping us

Is the "Fucked Four". Dallas: White Guilt Liberals. Houston: Katrina refugees and Home of Sheila Jackson Lee. San Antonio: La Raza, home of the Mexican Reconquista movement. Austin: California refugees. Unfortunately, those four cities are as blue and liberal as can be and contain a large amount of the state's population and wealth. Fortunately, the majority of residentss of those four cities are dependent on other's in the Red counties for food, water and energy production. They could easily be brought to heel. Those of us who are more independence-minded are generally self-supporting and prepared for battle.

As of 2014, Texas's per capita GDP in current dollars was about US$61,200, which would make it one of the top 10 wealthiest nations on the planet, equal to Australia.  Most of this top 10 is made up of very small and geopolitically irrelevant nations (Liechtenstein, Qatar, Luxembourg, Bermuda, Norway, and Switzerland), meaning that it would be Texas and Australia as the two wealthiest among the serious players.
An independent Texas would have the highest per capita GDP in the newly reconstituted G7.  For perspective, Texas's per capita GDP is 12% higher than the rest of the USA's, 22% larger than Canada's, 28% larger than Germany's, 32% larger than the U.K.'s, 43% larger than France's, 72% larger than Japan's, and 77% larger than Italy's.
Texas is already home to a massive manufacturing sector, especially in advanced technologies such as energy extraction and the defense industries.  There would be little transition time needed for it to begin building its own military.  If Texas spent just 5% of its GDP on defense, it would have the world's third largest military expenditures, bringing it into a tie with Russia and behind only the rest of the USA and China.  Of course, Texas also has the technological know-how, manufacturing capacity, and access to fissile materials required to develop and deploy its own nuclear weapons.
Texas has deepwater ports for a blue-water navy if it chose that route, as well as for global exports.  Vast fossil fuel and renewable energy reserves are located on Texas territory, ensuring energy independence and prosperity in perpetuity.

And my actual theme song is.....

Welcome to Camp Cuervo

Separated at birth?

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

King of the Hill

That is Max, asleep atop a mountain of clean unfolded laundry. ~sigh~

It happens to all of us

And this is where I lose my cool

I'm pretty cool to a certain extent about kids playing. But there is a point where "kids being kids" becomes "brats with no parental guidance or control". Teach your kids history, teach them respect, teach them about honor and sacrifice. For the love of God and all that's holy, teach your kids that the world exists beyond their little bubbles, and that all the freedoms they enjoy were bought and paid for by a small group of men and women who sacrificed. I'd be willing to bet the parents are off on a bench playing Candy Crush on their iPhones. Now I'm pissed off.

Just left of the sternum

For all the Aggies out there

My blog seems to attract them like 
UT students to a Bernie Sanders rally. 
This is seriously cool. Or hot. Whatever.

There's nothing like a good pair of CFMs